Peanut
January 8, 2003, 10:50 PM
T'was the month after Christams, and all through the house
Nothing would fit me not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (t'was less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please".
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt-
I said to myself, as only I can
"You can't spend the winter disguised as a man!"
So-away with the last of the sour creme dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I liked must be banished
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie-not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore--
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!!
:grin:
author unknown
Nothing would fit me not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (t'was less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please".
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt-
I said to myself, as only I can
"You can't spend the winter disguised as a man!"
So-away with the last of the sour creme dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I liked must be banished
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie-not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore--
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!!
:grin:
author unknown